The Grandparent Assistance Plan

And other tips for overworked and under-rested parents

Drama Files Title TilePaul and Katlin have been been married for ten years. Katlin reached out to our office because Paul has a very demanding profession. He is a truck driver and is required to be away from home five days a week. Katlin is a stay at home parent. She feels that his schedule is causing conflict and continues to place a great amount of pressure on her.

The couple has three small children and Katlin is overwhelmed by the care of their home and children. Another concern is that when Paul is home on the weekend he is asleep and offers no support. Katlin is at a point where she feels she is in a role of being a single parent and she is becoming very angry. She has made several attempts to express her concerns to Paul, but he is too tired to even listen to Katlin. Further, as the major financial contributor of the home, he wonders why there should not be any problems between them anyway.

Come To The Table

We asked Katlin to write down three concerns that she would be comfortable presenting to Paul during the therapy session.
1. Do you realize Paul that I am the primary caregiver for the home and children?
2. I would like to work on a schedule so when you return home I can have some time for me.
3. Please share with me how we can incorporate quality time for us and as a family?
At the onset of therapy Paul was hesitant. Sessions were scheduled on one of the only two days off and he needed to sleep. We were very sensitive to that fact, but if the concerns of the marriage were not met, it could cause more problems. The silence of not addressing the problems within the family structure does not make them disappear it is only on hold and unspoken. Paul was able to relax and listen to Katlin and her concerns during the session. She was very understanding regarding his needs for sleep and wanting to be with his family. But the question of “how” continued to be raised by Paul.

Katlin stated “it cannot be business as usual and we need a shift or we won’t make it.” Paul hung his head and didn’t know what to say.

We recommended that they utilize the grandparents once a month so that it would give them some quality time together, if possible. Also, Katlin needed to become little more organized with the home structure to help her reduce the stress levels in her life.

Compromise Is The Key

In marriage you have to be willing to compromise to save your relationship. It is vital that you pay attention to the small details and implement wisdom in family life. The couple has implemented the “Grandparent assistance program” once a month, rotating between the two sets of grandparents. It has proven to be a wonderful plan and the grandparents are enjoying the children. Also, Katlin has taken the time to organize the home and when Paul recognized Katlin’s efforts, he took her out on a date and brought her flowers and perfume. She was speechless and hugged Paul and thanked him.

Paul stated he did not realize the responsibilities Katlin had with three small children and he had taken that for granted. They are both pleased with the progress in their counseling process and they want to continue counseling and strive towards being one unit and a support to each other and their children.
We are happy to report from Kaitlin that “it is no longer business as usual but a marriage and home filled with forgiveness, prayer, and positive transformation.”

The names have been changed to protect the innocent.




2015 May/June Issue

Catch Your Breath – It is on God’s day that we see His power to create, His power to transform, and the grace-filled, elevated place for you in His plan.


Tired of this yet? How God’s Sabbath brings you into communion with Him on a different plane.

10  MY SABBATH JOURNEY
by Mina Collins / If you earnestly seek God He will meet you where you are.

11  YOU’RE SCHEDULED TO WORK ON SABBATH! WHAT NOW?
by Edward Woods III / God is an ever-present help in times of trouble.

14  SABBATH AND FESTIVALS
by Bertram Melbourne / Are all Sabbath festivals relevant and required today in light of the cross?

16  WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO THE SABBATH?
by Russell Seay, Jr. / The observance of the seventh-day Sabbath has been a part of biblical Christian history since the beginning of time.

18  INVESTIGATE: A QUESTION OF TIME
by Faith Johnson Crumbly / The Sabbath is a definite day according to the fourth commandment.

20  WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES A DAY MAKE?
by James R. Doggette, Jr. / One relevant question provides the answer.

22  THE BIG 10 NEVER-CHANGING PURPOSES OF THE SABBATH
by Wintley Phipps / A compact with humanity written by God’s own hand.

4  ELEVATION
by Phillip McGuire Wesley / MEDIA THAT TAKES YOU HIGHER

5  EDITORIAL
by Carmela Monk Crawford / WHY YOU NEED THE SABBATH

6  EYE ON THE TIMES
by James McWilliams / CASUALTIES AND BELIEF SYSTEMS

8  OPTIMAL HEALTH
by Donna Green Goodman/ FOODS THAT HEAL by Bernice DeShay / REST AND THE SABBATH

13  RELATIONSHIP Rx
by Willie and Elaine Oliver / LONG SUMMER DAYS AND SABBATH-KEEPING

24  FUTURECAST
by Carlton P. Byrd / THE SABBATH AS A MEMORIAL OF CREATION

26  THE EXPERIENCE
UNDERCOVER BOSS by Kymond Hines / NICODEMUS COMES TO JESUS UNDER THE COVER OF NIGHT

THE EXPERIENCE STUDY
by Rashad Burden / HAVE YOU MET JESUS?

31  MYTH BUSTERS
by Donald McPhaull / NO NAP? THE SABBATH REST

   

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