Black Love: Deeper Engagement

Friends, First Impressions and Getting the Ghost.

An In with the Squad

If you’re serious about your woman, you know that her friends matter. So, let’s talk strategy; let’s talk tactics (sounds serious), let’s talk about how you can win her girlfriends over too!

Rule numero uno: Be respectful. This goes without saying. Treat her friends with the same respect you would anyone else. Remember, they’re a reflection of your woman. As it says in 1 Peter 2:17, “Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers…”

Next up, you absolutely gotta get to know them. Learn their names, their interests, and what makes them tick. Remember what they tell you. Nothing says ‘I care’ like remembering that one of them is allergic to peanuts or is obsessed with old-school hip-hop.

Listen. And by that, I mean really listen. Don’t just nod and smile. Engage in conversations, ask questions, and show genuine interest in their opinions. Proverbs 18:2 tells us, “Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions.”

Show appreciation. A little thank you goes a long way. Thank them for their time, for their advice, and for the role they play in your woman’s life. Gratitude is always in style, as is clear in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “Give thanks in all circumstances…”

Be consistent. Don’t put on a show just for her friends and then act differently when they’re not around. That’s not a good look! Hypocrisy is a red flag. Be the same person you are when it’s just you and your woman. Authenticity is key, and as Matthew 5:37 advises, “Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’…”

Support your woman. Show her friends that you’re there for her, that you support her dreams and goals, and are there to cheer her on. As Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 tells us, “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”

Finally, don’t forget to have fun! Loosen up, share laughs, and create memorable experiences. Her friends will appreciate your effort to genuinely connect with them.

Winning her friends over is about showing them that you’re a good guy who genuinely cares about their friend.

 

In the world of our new BBL, we delve deeper into the soul, character, and values of a person.The BBL

Originally standing for ‘Brazilian Butt Lift,’ a surgical procedure gaining popularity, today we’re giving BBL a new meaning. Let’s shift the focus from physicality to personal growth.

Let’s redefine BBL as ‘Beyond Body Language.’Body language is a powerful tool in communication. However, we want to take it a step further. We want to encourage you to not just read body language, but also understand the person ‘beyond’ it.

That’s our new BBL – understanding the deeper layers of a person, beyond their physical appearance

In the world of our new BBL, we delve deeper into the soul, character, and values of a person. This isn’t just about dating or making new friends; it’s about every human interaction you engage in.

The first ‘B’ in our BBL is about ‘Beliefs.’ What are the person’s beliefs, values, and principles? Understanding this helps us align with people who share similar beliefs or learn from those who hold different perspectives.

The second ‘B’ stands for ‘Behaviors.’ How does the person react to different situations? Are they calm and collected in face of adversity? Do they treat others with respect and kindness? Their behaviors can tell you a lot about their character.

The ‘L’ stands for ‘Learning.’ Are they open to learning and growing? Do they admit their mistakes and learn from them? A willingness to learn is a key indicator of a mature, grounded individual.

In the wise words of 1 Samuel 16:7, “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

So, fam, let’s change the meaning of BBL. Let’s look beyond the physical, beyond the body language, and delve deeper into understanding the person. Let’s keep it real, let’s keep it deep. You’ve got this!

Ghosted

One moment you’re vibing with someone, the connection is real, and then, poof! They’ve vanished, left you hanging without an explanation. I find that disrespectful, by the way. This phenomenon, known as ‘ghosting,’ is becoming a common trend in today’s dating world. But is it right? And how can you navigate these murky waters?

In the words of Christian relationship expert, Dr. Henry Cloud, “When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated.”

Ghosting essentially breaks down communication, which is the cornerstone of any relationship. But remember, fam, it’s not about blaming yourself. The action of ghosting speaks more about the person who ghosts, not the one ghosted.

When someone ghosts you, it can be hard not to take it personally. But you need to remember your worth. The Bible reminds us in Psalm 139:14 (NLT), “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” You are valuable, and you deserve to be treated with respect.

It can be tempting to retaliate, to try and make the other person feel what you’re feeling. But in Romans 12:17 (NLT), we’re reminded, “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable.” Responding with grace and integrity, even in the face of hurt, defines your character.

Ultimately, it’s about finding closure within yourself and moving forward. Proverbs 4:25 (NLT) advises us, “Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you.” Don’t let someone else’s actions deter your journey.

Ghosting is tough, I get it. But remember, it’s a reflection of the other person’s ability to handle relationships, not a measure of your worth.

Keep it pure, keep it a buck, and stay true to your values. We’re in this together!